tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post8000454778374768859..comments2024-03-29T06:37:18.029-04:00Comments on Not Running a Hospital: Advice to referees -- and managers?Paul Levyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17065446378970179507noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-61638579208170136702008-12-21T01:26:00.000-05:002008-12-21T01:26:00.000-05:00As a competitive female soccer player of over 20 y...As a competitive female soccer player of over 20 years I appreciate the noted differences in not only play-related tactics on a team, but social differences that come into play. As a referee, I've been priviledged to observe these dynamics from the outside, and it's given me some insight on how I've behaved and what roles I've played. I'm now a hospital manager, and the same truisms are at work. The better you understand those you work with (and for) the better colleague you can be. The fact that women and men tend to approach things in a different way simply means that we all have a bit more work to do in understanding the differences between us. The same applies to different cultures and different ages, does it not? I'm glad to see that once again, you've brought some insight of value here to your blog.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12984907053344256876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-75040872567508058662007-06-04T18:42:00.000-04:002007-06-04T18:42:00.000-04:00Thanks very much for the insights.Thanks very much for the insights.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-60153758914489934152007-06-04T16:06:00.000-04:002007-06-04T16:06:00.000-04:00Paul;Inevitably, a blog owner, sometimes unknowing...Paul;<BR/><BR/>Inevitably, a blog owner, sometimes unknowingly, imprints his personality on his/her blog, and you have done so on yours, as have others I read.<BR/>Those readers who do not respond to the owner's personality will stop reading the blog, so be it.<BR/>As for me, it's part of what I find interesting about your blog, so keep up with the repartee!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-33642128116609888852007-06-04T15:53:00.000-04:002007-06-04T15:53:00.000-04:00You weren't being baited. Anonymous Man was simpl...You weren't being baited. Anonymous Man was simply practicing an age-old tactic of advancing a flawed argument, watching it get demolished and then claiming you either (a) misunderstood his argument and how deeply intelligent he is, or (b) understood his argument but demolished it TOO completely, in which case (he thinks) you're not very nice. It's not your problem either way and, as the father of 4 daughters, I found the post pretty insightful.<BR/><BR/>And if it worries you at all, AM is not going anyplace. He'll continue to lurk...Vertical Manhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14331183720066540623noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-84123927884738661252007-06-04T15:49:00.000-04:002007-06-04T15:49:00.000-04:00Well, I have been waiting for the "battle of the s...Well, I have been waiting for the "battle of the sexes" to erupt over this post. Anon 11:48, sorry you didn't see its humorous aspects, whether or not you agree with its assertions. (How did I intuit that this hostility had something to do with the gay pride post? Must be because I'm female. (:)<BR/><BR/>I actually think there is a fair degree of stereotyping in Dr. Moore's email, but it does contain some important lessons for the workplace. Example: as a lady doc working primarily with (male)surgeons, I was always told that they preferred working with me rather than the other female partner in our pathology group, apparently because I was more straightforward in my communications with them. (even matching their decibel level on occasion.) Conversely, I once inadvertantly insulted a female general surgeon by advising she get a tertiary consult on a difficult soft tissue tumor, totally unaware she had done a fellowship in the surgery of soft tissue tumors. Rather than correcting me on the spot, or making any comment at all, she went back to her male partner and had HIM call the (male) chief of pathology and complain about me. Although I immediately called her and apologized, I remained mystified as to why she never approached me directly. This post has helped me understand it - thanks! Guess I'd been working with the men too long, though, and become like them. <BR/>Just like with any cultural difference, one must be sensitive and proceed with caution.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-41118767070930368992007-06-04T15:02:00.000-04:002007-06-04T15:02:00.000-04:00Golly, I guess he was really upset.I never knew I ...Golly, I guess he was really upset.<BR/><BR/>I never knew I had dictator-like skills! And meglomania, too! I knew a blog was inherently narcissistic, but I guess I missed my transition to meglomania.<BR/><BR/>Anyway, Anon 11:48 was quite correct. I guess I'll have to be more careful about being baited.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-67922701429194353972007-06-04T14:31:00.000-04:002007-06-04T14:31:00.000-04:00I am sorry to see that I got you so boiled up that...I am sorry to see that I got you so boiled up that you had to use Google as well; I missed that prior to sending my prior (and as it would appear, second to last) post. Your Google search doesn't prove anything. I am not suggesting that there is no difference between men and women. I was merely trying to point out at the end that it may have ramifications with regards to how it is interpreted and therefore pose a risk to you and your organization. Please do the rest of your readers the service of letting them know if it ever gets mentioned if one of your female employees is passed up for a promotion. I shan't be bothering with your megalomania again: like you have not-so-subtly let me (us) know who the boss of this little piece of cyberspace is, you are, quite thankfully, not the boss of me.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-7257226062896657432007-06-04T14:24:00.000-04:002007-06-04T14:24:00.000-04:00No question you were defensive in your post reply ...No question you were defensive in your post reply to me. I think that that is a truism the point someone finishes their last two paragraphs with the word "finally". No one's questioning who has final authority on your blog, Mr. Levy. If you found my post to be offensive you might have employed the tact you used in responding to your homophobic colleague rather than demonstrating some of your more dictator-like skills.<BR/><BR/>In terms of your specific statements:<BR/>"Odd that you find it sexist, by which you suggest that it denigrates women in some way." I agree with you, I should have started by saying that it could be interpreted that way and thus puts you at risk of being misinterpreted. <BR/><BR/>"As for what my audience finds stimulating, please don't jump to conclusions. This post has been receiving tons of traffic, etc." Are you really so insecure as to have to include this statement? I thought not. But if it feels good to hear it, Mr. Levy, I think you're smart and interesting.<BR/><BR/>"Finally, if you don't see any relationship between coaching a sports team and managing an organization, you are missing something important." I never suggested that this was not the case; you inferred incorrectly I was saying that.<BR/><BR/>"Finally, as Ronald Reagan once said, 'this is my microphone'." Based on your response, I see more in common between you and President Reagan that might have otherwise first met the eye. Thanks for making it a bit more obvious.<BR/><BR/>I shall refrain from posting on your site again given your obvious disdain for a truly open forum. Godspeed, Mr. Levy. And remember, you're really, really important and we all think you're just dandy.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-75970157222062464052007-06-04T11:51:00.000-04:002007-06-04T11:51:00.000-04:00Defensive? Moi?:))Defensive? Moi?<BR/><BR/>:))Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-36020374657742017542007-06-04T11:48:00.000-04:002007-06-04T11:48:00.000-04:00"please don't provide me advice on leaving out thi..."please don't provide me advice on leaving out things on this blog that I find personally interesting."<BR/><BR/>Paul, <BR/><BR/>No need to react so strongly to anon 11:38. No need to get defensive. Just let it go..Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-3675867530732261392007-06-04T09:51:00.001-04:002007-06-04T09:51:00.001-04:00sounds real timely, they got a movieabout it? GRAC...sounds real timely, they got a movie<BR/>about it? GRACIE,,dont know if the coaches/refs get much time?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-12969180411206583902007-06-04T09:51:00.000-04:002007-06-04T09:51:00.000-04:00There is a long and well-researched body of solid ...There is a long and well-researched body of solid research on male-female differences, which some posters here apparently are not familiar with. Though I'm not much of a fan of excessively long blog posts like this one (hint: consider posting as links and brief summaries here as I'd wager that most people haven't read the whole thing carefully, including, perhaps, those dismissing it), I think this one very important.<BR/><BR/>When I started my accidental consulting career many moons ago, I was almost always the only woman in the room. As clients, almost to a person men, advanced up the ladder, so did I. Last year, last year, I was giving a small seminar and for the first time, the first time in 30 yrs, there was a majority of women in the room.<BR/><BR/>So like many of my female peers, I have hungered for "data" confirming that we experience life--whether consulting to high-powered guys or kicking a ball down the field with a man screaming from the sidelines--differently from the way "the books" tell us it should be. Just like the stunning cardiac research that says women present heart attack symptoms "differently." Differently from what?!?<BR/><BR/>Though I've never played any team sport, I found myself nodding as I read this. As an "external" in many big orgs over the yrs, I've had numerous young women come to me for advice in situations that mimic these -- being yelled at in front of other people or its insidious inverse, being praised publically and ridiculed in private, being reprimanded for running, figuratively, to someone else's defense, etc.<BR/><BR/>Understanding differences, almost a cliche at this point, is, I believe, critical to healthy organizations and, if I can be so arch, planetary survival. Male-female differences are universal while also being culturally dependent. I could go on and on thus making this post as long as yours, Paul, but, for the record, while I was writing this, I received a call from one of those high-powered execs I've consulted to, a man, of course, who just sang "Happy Birthday" to me in Swedish. Clearly some guys like you get it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-30348926575615683222007-06-04T06:47:00.000-04:002007-06-04T06:47:00.000-04:00More for anon 11:38. Lots has been written on thi...More for anon 11:38. Lots has been written on this subject. I just did a 30 second scan following a Google search:<BR/><BR/>Understanding the Differences Between How Women and Men Communicate, Canadian Journal for Women in Coaching, http://www.coach.ca/WOMEN/e/journal/may2001/print_out.htm<BR/><BR/>Gender and Competition: How Men and Women Approach Work and Play Differently, by Kathleen Deboer.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-48796173923404462892007-06-04T06:37:00.000-04:002007-06-04T06:37:00.000-04:00Dave, I received your note. Not right for this po...Dave, I received your note. Not right for this post. Will return to it later.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-58310418737102396762007-06-04T06:36:00.000-04:002007-06-04T06:36:00.000-04:00Odd that you find it sexist, by which you suggest ...Odd that you find it sexist, by which you suggest that it denigrates women in some way. I don't see it that way at all. This researcher simply suggests that women can be observed to behave differently in a team situation from men. The characteristics the excerpt ascribes to women are, in fact, quite positive in many ways. <BR/><BR/>As for what my audience finds stimulating, pleae don't jump to conclusions. This post has been receiving tons of traffic. Many people have been telling me (i.e., in person and by email) that they find it VERY interesting.<BR/><BR/>Finally, if you don't see any relationship between coaching a sports team and managing an organization, you are missing something important.<BR/><BR/>Finally, as Ronald Reagan once said, "this is my microphone". I am sure you mean it in the most helpful way, but please don't provide me advice on leaving out things on this blog that I find personally interesting.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-10216875487173982472007-06-03T23:38:00.000-04:002007-06-03T23:38:00.000-04:00this was borderline sexist and not even that inter...this was borderline sexist and not even that interesting. i think you might want to draw the line between what you personally find interesting (soccer, officiating) and what your "audience" finds stimulating. given your position this type of post might not go over so well with the large number of women you employ. seems to me you've given cause for any "wrongful termination" lawsuit that ever occurs under your watch.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-20971563894882969812007-06-02T14:35:00.000-04:002007-06-02T14:35:00.000-04:00Oh, and also, the same goes for the best managers ...Oh, and also, the same goes for the best managers in business situations.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-60922842146623485582007-06-02T14:34:00.000-04:002007-06-02T14:34:00.000-04:00To anon 7:53 and anon 7:54,Feel free to make fun, ...To anon 7:53 and anon 7:54,<BR/><BR/>Feel free to make fun, but experienced refs will tell you that the best refs are those who understand the players they are officiating and are able to empathize with what they are feeling.<BR/><BR/>Yes, and also make the right calls.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-52949355571952016212007-06-02T10:44:00.000-04:002007-06-02T10:44:00.000-04:00As always, an interesting and thought provoking po...As always, an interesting and thought provoking post. I guess I’ll have to dust off my old Sigmund Freud, Erik Erickson, Carl Jung, and Carl Rogers texts from my early graduate school days (before I sold out and joined the world of high finance) for a quick review before this morning’s game. Hopefully I can leave B.F. Skinner in the box in the basement though I sometimes think that many of the referees (me included) are closet behaviorialists.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-62606204130326531382007-06-02T07:54:00.000-04:002007-06-02T07:54:00.000-04:00Please, Ref, WATCH THE GAME. Quit taking Cosmo qui...Please, Ref, WATCH THE GAME. Quit taking Cosmo quizzes.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32053362.post-34824844181413746742007-06-02T07:53:00.000-04:002007-06-02T07:53:00.000-04:00Now I know why refs miss so much - they are sociol...Now I know why refs miss so much - they are sociology grad students! This is filled with amusing observations about men and women but I truly hope nobody would apply this to real girls. Even if this were all true, we are supposed to call young people to the highest standards, aren't we? And not just to accommodate juveline habits ad infinitum?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com