Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Would you buy anything from this company?

Another in a series of unsolicited email solicitations, many with undue informality. A marketing company, at that.

Is grammar dead? Punctuation? Correct capitalization?

Subject: Re:Thank you for your time on the call - Paul (Of course, there was no call, and this was not a return of an email.)

Hi Paul,

This is Jessica from an Online Marketing Solutions Company called Futuristic Inc.,


We are a Global database company providing customized & complete marketing solutions based on your needs across the globe. Business Expansion, Lead Generation, & Brand awareness are what we are best at. We partner you in increasing your clientele and reach globally.


Our Expertise includes List Acquisition, Email Appending and Email Marketing across all industries, worldwide. There is always an advantage in keeping an updated database of your target market as it helps you to retain your clients and also enables you to get new business opportunities.


To know more on how we can help you in your marketing initiatives, kindly let me know a convenient time when we can have a quick call to discuss or respond to this email with your Target audience and Industry and I would revert accordingly.


Looking forward to your response.


Regards,

Jessica [last name removed]

Marketing Manager

Futuristic inc.,

9 comments:

Elisabeth said...

But don't you have the itch to copy and paste into a Word document, track changes and send it back to her? May end up being the most profitable cold call she ever made.

Paul Levy said...

Truthfully, I did have that inclination, but I will leave that to others.

William said...

This is surely just random spam, no? Nothing specific to you that I can see... By replying you're inviting confirmation that your account is active. Brace for more!

jessica lipnack said...

I'm changing my name.

Christine said...

I think we can safely say this is spam, but the sentence ending in the preposition is the one that got me...being the proud grammar geek that I am!

e-Patient Dave said...

LOL...my experience is that in the last few years, no field in legitimate marketing has more scuzzy two-bit doofuses (doofi?) than email list brokers. Especially those who use scuzzy email marketing to sell their services. :)

Yes, I bet she would revert accordingly. :)

To disincent such people, you could put their name in your post title, which, given your audience size, might cause this post to show up when people google their company name. :)

Paul Levy said...

Transferred from Facebook:

Jim: Revert accordingly...hahaha!

Bob: I can hardly stand the sight of inappropriate capitalization, but that "revert accordingly" makes this a keeper. Revert to what?

Seth: Truly excellent.

Thomas: I would pay to see her revert accordingly .... oh ... goodness ... did I say that out loud?

Rob: I am. Not certain What you, see wrong In this?

Ann: Paul, seriously did you make that up as a pre-April fools joke?

me: No way.

Anonymous said...

Christine: Where is that sentence at?

Anonymous said...

Yes, their own client and prospect lists.